Jobs and birth control are hot topics in our country and I have a solution for both issues.
It keeps the magicians employed and prevents any sexual conduct between the dining date for at least 24 hours.
A lot of people mock romance novels. A lot. But I maintain that they are wonderful to read, and not just because they can have great, exciting, funny, scary, action-packed, whatever stories written by amazing authors.
I think romance can help your sex life.
I read a lot of romance novels before I ever had sex. Hell, before I ever had a boyfriend. And you know what I learned from them?
- Sex can be pleasurable for a woman. In a world that tells most women that she’s only good for lookin’ pretty, here is an entire genre of books that tells women that they can and should and deserve to feel wonderful when they have sex.
- What to expect when I had sex for the first time. Now, yes, romance can couch its acts in flowery expressions and prose, but frankly, it talks about mechanics from the point of view of the woman. It was way better than the weird 1970s “how to” book handed to me by my mother. *shudder*
- What an orgasm was. Maybe how it kinda felt. When I had one, I knew what that shit was! Thanks, romance!
- To ask for what I wanted. Since I’d learned that sex could be pleasurable, and what an orgasm was, I followed the lead of a few of my favorite heroines who demonstrated sexual agency and encouraged my partner to do what felt good to me.
Now that I’m an old married lady, I’m not ashamed to say that a well-written sex scene in a romance I’m enjoying will give me… ideas. [Insert eyebrow waggle here.] My husband says, “Thanks, romance!”
And those are just some of the reasons why I love and write romance.
So I emailed Gymboree with a complaint about their “Pretty Like Mommy,” “Handsome Like Daddy” clothes for babies. I received a pretty bullshit answer in response, to which I said:
I am still unclear as to why there is no line of girls’ clothing that also highlights their intelligence.
Today, I received this email:
Thank your for your response in regards to this matter.
On behalf of the moms, dads, sisters, brothers, sons and daughters that make up our team at The Gymboree Corporation, we want to be very clear that we believe that all girls and boys should be encouraged to achieve their full potential. We do not believe in gender stereotypes and are committed to the development of happy, healthy children.
Our customers and the children in your lives are at the core of our business. We continually strive to exceed your expectations for quality and service. Effective Monday, November 14th, the “Pretty Like Mommy”, “Handsome Like Daddy” and “Smart Like Daddy” bodysuits were removed from our Gymboree retail stores as well as our website.
Thank you again for your feedback. We always appreciate hearing from you!
Gymboree Customer Service
First of all, why the hell were there a “Handsome Like Daddy” and “Smart Like Daddy” options, but only “Pretty Like Mommy” but no “Smart Like Mommy” garments?
Second—YES, YOU DICKWADS TAKE THAT SHIT OFF THE SHELVES AND FUCK YOU FOR ATTEMPTING TO PERPETUATE THE NOTION THAT WOMEN SHOULD ONLY ASPIRE TO BEING DECORATIVE OBJECTS. Thank you for listening to your customers. Next time, pay better attention.